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{479} LXIX

HOW THE INTELLIGENT HAVE TO DWELL IN SOLITUDE

 

Listen, my beloved, to what our love says to thee.

If thou desirest that thy labours shall not be empty and thy days idle and thyself destitute of the profit which the intelligent expect from the discipline of quiet, let then thy entering into solitude take place with discrimination, not in a kind of groove, as it is with many. But let there be an aim towards which thy mind directs the labours of its behaviour1. And interrogate those who have solid knowledge, through experience, not through reading only. And exercise thyself in all the wonderful and liberal distinctions of solitude, without taking– rest before thou art trained in all the ways of its service. And at every step thou takest, examine whether thou art walking in the way, or thou hast erred away from it on one of the ways leading to the desert.

Thou must not believe that the true discipline of solitude is accomplished by visible labours alone. If thou desirest to reach by personal experience that which our Fathers have found, thou must secretly have signs and tokens in thy soul, at every step thou takest, by which thou canst recognise the truth of our Fathers or the error of Satan. A few of them, written in order that thou mayest become wise in thy way are as follows. {480} When thou seest, in solitude, that thy mind is able to use freely its righthand impulses and that there is no compulsion in its rule over any of them, then know that thy solitude is right. And if, while thou art performing thy service with discrimination, without distraction as much as possible, the words are suddenly cut off from thy mouth, and the bonds of com|pulsory silence are placed on thy soul and this phenomenon is constantly repeated, then know that thou art making progress in thy solitude and that its simple beginnings are taking increase.

For simple solitude is rejected by justice. And every simple [act of] discipline, among discriminate sages is accounted as a lonely, helpless member.

And if thou seest that at every deliberation which stirs in thy soul, at every recollection and vision happening during solitude, the surroundings of thy eyes are filled with tears and thy cheeks are moistened by them, without compulsion, then know that before thee, in the opposing camp, there begins to grow a breach.

And if thou findest that thy spirit, from time to time, descends within them without unusual efforts, and abides there some time, whatever that time be and afterwards thou seest thy members as it were in great weakness, while peace reigns over all thy deliberations, but [the weakness] remains continually the same, then know that the cloud has begun to cover the tabernacle.

If, during thy abiding in solitude, thou findest that harsh {481} deliberations reign over thy soul, and that it is tyrannised by them every moment, and that at all times the mind is attracted by those things which were administered before, namely, when it is desirous of vain investigations – then know that thou art fatiguing thyself with solitude in vain and that thy soul is corrupted by distraction, and that there are outward causes, or inward neglect of duties, especially of vigils and recitation. Then direct and fix thy will. But if thou doest not find peace from the assaults of the affections as soon as these days begin, then be not astonished.

Now2, if the bosom of the earth when the sunrays have ceased, preserves their heat for a long time, and if an aromatic smell and the odour of perfumes which spread through the air, remain a long time before they are dissipated and become effaced – how much more certain is it, that the affections, like dogs accustomed to lap up blood at the butcher’s, will stand at the door barking, when the usual food is withheld from them, till their old force has abated.|

When neglect begins to penetrate into thy soul secretly and to spread gloom, and the house is near to being filled with darkness, then thou wilt secretly perceive in thyself these signs which will soon appear: Thy faith will be weakened. Visible things will arouse thy covetousness. Thy confidence will diminish. Thy neighbour thou wilt wrong. And thy whole person, thy month and thy heart, will be full of vituperation against every {482} man and thing and against that which thy deliberations and senses meet, and even against the most High. And thou wilt be terrified by the frailty of the body which has rendered thee pusillanimous at all times. And from time to time thy soul will be shaken by fear, so that thou shalt be frightened and terrorised as it were by thy shadow.

For by faith I do not understand that which is the foundation of the common confession, but the intelligible force that by the light of the mind supports the heart, and by inward testimony stirs in the soul great confidence in God; so that the soul does not provide for itself, but casts all its cares on the Lord without thinking of any of them.

Then, when thou art making intelligible progress, thou wilt soon perceive in thy soul these dim signs. By hope thou shalt become strong, and by prayer rich. And continually abundant profit will be the part of thy mind in all that thou meetest, and thou wilt perceive the weakness of human nature. On the one hand thou must beware of haughtiness –, on the other hand let injury against thy neighbour be despicable in thy eyes. Departing the body has become desirable to thee because of the desire to be near those things in which we are going to live. And as for all the afflicting accidents which happen to thee manifestly and secretly thou wilt soon find that all of them happen to thee justly, in all sincerity which is far from {483} presumption. And concerning all these thou shalt make confession.

These are signs for the watchful and for those who constantly dwell in solitude and wish to reach veraciousness of behaviour. Those who are relaxed, do not want subtle signs indicating hidden traps. For they are also far from hidden virtues.

As soon as one of these begins to show itself in thy soul, then at once try to understand towards which side it begins to incline; then thou shalt know at the same time to which category it belongs.|

 

1 Book of the Dove, p. 19

2 Introduction